I re-read the story, and did find where the jock thinks to himself that he’s falling for this girl. Still, the commenter you were blasting, dwduck, made some valid points – and you addressed them. XXX You clearly have a talent for writing; keep with it. I re-read the story, and did find where the jock thinks to himself that he’s falling for this girl. Also, my comments about the author’s gender were out of line, as it has nothing to do with the story. Constructive criticism: try double-spacing between paragraphs and lines of dialogue. Frankly, I didn’t read your story all that closely, chiefly due to the god-awful spacing – it’s hard to read a wall-o-text.
Actors:
Bianca / Sandrayandres
