I was forced to rate your story a ZERO!anonymous readerReport 2013-06-13 07:26:44As everyone else is saying grammer and spelling however I like the story and was able to keep track right to the end, now I’m hoping you continue this as there are many different ways you could take this, could even be made into a short novel. XXX You just need a proofreader in my opinion.anonymous readerReport 2013-06-13 06:48:44holy shit, sounded great to me at the beginning, near the end I couldn’t stand trying to make sense of it please revise this, or at least make the 2nd chapter tons better than this one because I couldn’t make heads or tales of the story near the endanonymous readerReport 2013-06-13 03:07:42looked like great start to a series however it was soo hard to read, angel to angle, smock as smoke, and soo many others cant read it…
